Writing vs Life | Balancing Work & Family | Writing Forum

When I have to take care of Mom. When it takes me 12 times as long to write something. Often it means I am overly tired – either mentally, physically, or both. It ain't gonna happen so might as well step away. 

Wow, busy lady. Hope you and your fur family and the man are all getting better.

I was trying to tweet you, but Twitter just hates me lately and let you know that I would be glad to help out with the forums and maybe even some AFW blog posts while you deal with the whirlwind of busy. Just want to help you out if I can, but I understand all the same if you don't want to take me up on my offer.

If I were in your situation, I would try to take time off even sooner to do some unwinding. Everything sounds mega stressful on your end.

And Cathy, you are such a dear. I hope your family is doing well, too.

Jennifer Mattern said:

I can't even imagine Cathy. That has to be a tough situation at times, although obviously great that you're able to be there to help her out at the same time. Is your schedule largely unpredictable as a caregiver now, or do you still have a general routine most of the time?

I don't want to paint a worse picture than it is. Mom (knock on wood) is extremely healthy, but she is 89 so that's going to mean (as I call it) maintenance issues-(she had two cataract surgeries and a knee replacement last year), and taking care of the things that go along with a house sitting on an acre of land.

My schedule is fairly predictable. As you know, I get up at the crack of dawn-typically 2-3 hours before Mom. So, that's prime time for me. The toughest thing is the constant interruptions. My Mom is one of those that once she thinks of something, she has to discuss it RIGHT NOW. I've tried training her to wait until we sit down for lunch or when I quit for the day (which is fairly early – 4 -5 PM). She gets better for a little while, then it's back to her norm. 

What it has taught me is the beauty of being flexible. If I have a non-productive day, I find a way to deal with it and make it up another time.

Cathy -- Do you work in a closed off room with a door? Maybe a gentle "do not disturb" kind of sign would help to remind her that you're at work even if you're technically at home. Or would she just come on in anyway? 

I have two places – one is open with a great view. When I really want to concentrate, I go to a bedroom with a computer and close the door. That does not always deter Mom. You know how it goes (at least for me), there is how you act with everyone else, then there's how you act with Mom – definitely not the same.

I believe that family is the most important part of my life, and it always prevails my work. Thus, when my parents are in extreme need of help, I can put the work aside for a while.